Lulu's House of Horrors
5140 Butler Pike
Plymouth Meeting, PA
I was going out to the burbs to watch my mom's cat and decided to visit this haunt with my old buddy Adam who I don't see often because I hardly go to the burbs. I picked him up at the mall and we headed to Plymouth Meeting to check out this Hayride. I have avoided this haunt for awhile for two reasons, the first one is the name and the second one is that they have never made it on the 13 Haunts site. When we got to the parking lot my buddy Adam was telling me he is going to wait in the car. I told him that he needs to come in and he is not waiting in the car. I convince him this is not going to be scary and I would pay for him to go. This gets him out of the car and into the ticketing area at least.
The attraction is located at a local club but looks more like a stadium at a high school complete with bleachers and such. We get our tickets and head over to the hayride area past a small carnival set up. There was no sign for the hayride, only a mechanical ghost that looked as if it was purchased at Spirit Halloween. There was only 3 other people in line for the wagon and overall it looked like less then 30 people were there at all on opening night. We go to the ticket lady for the hayride and she looks like a grandmother who is playing candy-crush on her iPad. The whole time I am trying to calm down my buddy Adam who keeps saying he does not want to go in. I say it's not scary and the ticket lady is trying to contradict me. I tell her I am only telling Adam this so he will calm down. She was missing the point and was one tough cookie. I decide to take him to get an ice tea and we head back. The ticket lady was saying to hurry becayse the wagon was loading. I sarcastically say that I am running and she says, "It doesn't look like you are running." We get into the wagon being driven by a guy who looks like a grandfather.
The first scene is a classic hillbilly scene that was performed by 3 senior citizens in slow motion. My buddy Adam was not scared, thank goodness, but I can't help but laugh at this long hillbilly scene that was taking forever because the group of elderly guys had to get up in the wagon. They eventually fire a gun that nearly makes us deaf and we continue to the next scene. This scene was an older guy playing Jason with a chain-saw that is electric, sawing a body in half. Adam was remaining calm but the wagon then came to a graveyard. The graveyard was not too impressive with some extending stunts of things to jump out at you and another elderly guy crawling out of the ground. To his credit, he did look like he was a dead guy crawling out of the ground.
We make our way to the house where a nun greets us and tells us this is a scary ride. Adam is now freaking out on me and does not want to go it. I convinced him again that it's not that scary (keep in mind the median age was like 70) and he agrees to go in. We entered an older traditional house, that was made of thick plaster and was naturally a decent house for a haunted house set, and are guided into a room where there was a guy who had a body in front of him wrapped in burlap and tied with chains. He tells us to put our hands on the body, but Adam is too scared so I do it. Eventually the body rocked like it's alive and we were ushered out the room to another room where there was a butcher with a pig mask. By this time, Adam was behind me and choking me by grabbing my sweatshirt. The pig butcher turned around and a giant pig animatronic comes out of the butcher block. This startled Adam and we rushed up the stairs.
When we got to the next room there was a giant table and a wolf jumped up which was again another large animatronic. We headed sideways past a woman in a picture, and into another creepy room with a demented character that we ran through because I didn't think Adam could take anymore. By this time I could hardly breath. We headed down stairs and Adam thought it was the end so he was relieved and we turned the corner and there was a clown in a cage with a guy being electrocuted. I didn't really understand these together but this caused Adam to run through the room onto a vibrating floor pad which makes him jump and scream. We went out the back of the house and Adam at this point wanted to kill me. I was laughing the whole time because this was on the low end of scary for me, but Adam made it seem like the scariest house of all time, so I guess these things are relative. We continued on the wagon where a guy went by on a zip line a little too high because we barely saw him. There was a Freddy Kruger scene but the guy doing Freddy should re-watch the movies. Then we came across the classic gag of a car coming at the wagon which was a pretty good stunt for this haunt because the car comes and drops down and catches on fire. The final scare was a giant sign that fell at the wagon. Adam was totally relieved that we were at the end but then they send us through a corn maze where children are dressed up like scarecrows and for some reason Adam is once again terrified and drug me screaming through this corn maze.
I couldn't have taken a better person to go with me through this haunted house, which is perfect for a local club fund raiser, children, or people who are looking for a light weight haunted house to visit.
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